Home Facebook Storenvy
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price




A lot of our old songs were cool, but they sounded like shit. So we decided to re-record some of the best ones.




released November 1, 2013




DICKCRUSH RECORDS Rockford, Illinois

Dickcrush Records is a DIY label from Rockford, Illinois.
Turning grind, powerviolence, noise, and everything in between into a stupid joke since 2012.

contact / help


Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Track Name: All I Wanna Do Is Smash Shit Up
All I wanna do is fucking smash shit up
Who do we know that has Gamecube controllers?
Why's this fucking game so hard to find?
All I wanna do is fucking smash shit up
Smash, Thrash, Kill
Super Smash Bros. Melee
Ryne's in the lead, Smash till fingers bleed
Fuck your PK Thunder, I'll fuckin' break your knees
Turn those fucking items off, we're not fucking pussies here
Leave on Mr. Saturn, cause he's the only man in here
I'll smash attack your screw attack, leave you flyin' outta here
Luigi's crazy waddle thing makes me crack up
Track Name: Cholesterol Overload
Taco John's is the fucking shit, if you don't like it you can eat my dick
Cholesterol Overload
Little Caesar's every day, if you watch your weight you're fucking gay
Cholesterol Overload
Track Name: You Know How Many Dudes I've Boned In My Life? Zero.
We've been in this band for like a goddamn year
By now I thought I'd be in pussy up to my ears
I'm an attractive man
I'm in a kick ass band
I haven't so much as dipped my toe
Got no bitches, got no hoes
I'm an attractive man
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Am I not suave enough for you?
Am I just a joke to you?
I'm an attractive man
Now show me you cans
Track Name: Bitchless
In a pit of self-loathing
Realization of my fate
Discover why girls are repulsed by me
I blame the hairs on my face
Every single hair on my upper lip
Represents a bitch that won't touch my dick
I can't grow a mustache
Bitches hate my scumstache
Track Name: Untitled 8
Fuck you.
Track Name: Burned By The Sun
There's no escape, no hope for shade
Your skin she wants; Your skin, she'll take
Your shoulders, they don't stand a chance
Your neck's as red as Satan's ass
Burned by the sun
Radiation cannot be outrun
Stripped of my clothes, sunblock is gone
Mom, put a sprinkler on the front lawn
Mere inches away from Melanoma
Burned by the sun
Track Name: Predicated Prune
I wanna be in a touring band
I guess I'm just not cool enough, man
I wanna be in a sweet fucking band
I guess I'm not hardcore enough
Even my own mom told me I'm a waste of space and a waste of life
She said I'm not hardcore enough for her, and to get the fuck out
Hate every second of this life
Wish I was in Trapped Under Ice
Track Name: Untitled 10
Feline face off
Fight to the death
My cat will eat your cat's throat
Track Name: I Hate My Job (Let's Get Drunk And Geocache)
I hate my job
Let's get drunk and geocache
Track Name: Friend Is The Only Label I Need (Have Fun Cover)
I don't need an X on my hand to keep me from getting fucked up
I don't need to fucking drink to have fun
I don't need drugs to realize life is fucking rad
There are no prerequisites to gain my friendship
Fuck these labels that seperate
You don't need a mowhawk
You don't need an X on your hand
You don't need a fucking shaved head
You don't need a patched out vest
Just to be my friend